Early mornings mean nap time for Orion.
He woke up at around 6:30 this morning, and I was not yet ready to leave my sleep behind. Naturally, the three year old won. I was up by 7, serving him breakfast and filling up his water bottle. Thankfully I still had some chia pudding left so there was no need for negotiations.
By 10 am we leisurely left for our shopping walk, first, dropping off our dirty sheets at the laundry house. I love walking around the neighborhood, going where locals go, feeling the energy and reading the people. I feel their simplicity, their presence. I love their adoration for Orion who stand out in a crowd with his blond man-bun and his 80’s looking sunglasses.
A few of my cloth bags get filled at the first store with some local snacks and house necessities. Then we skip the produce market next to it and go to the one closer to our house. I have already learned that they have a fresher selection and today they had a lot less flies too.
I had another person contact me today, obvious in their misunderstanding at what I am doing in mexico, asking me if I have been to this place or that. I am still working on my response as many just don’t seem to understand; We are not on a vacation or a holiday. We also did not move to Mexico. We are simply existing in this world, migrating wherever the wind takes me, all while parenting my kids. This means, like all single parents, I am responsible to have a roof over their head, food on their plates, clothes on their back, and love in their home. It just so happens that at the moment, the roof over our head is in Mexico. It is affordable and warmer, albeit the heat is more for me then the kids, or my daughter in particular. I shop in local markets, which happen to be in Merida at the moment. Every time I go out with the 3 year old, I go through a series of negotiations so that I can let him down that we are not buying toys and cars and candy. I just happen to do this in front of many latin speaking neighbors, versus english speaking. I’m sure it’s an intriguing show.
At the end of the day though, I am just a mom, going through her day doing what needs to be done while remembering to squeeze in some self time to do what I want. Presence is still the name of the game, no worrying or strategic planing. Just live in the now and it will all unfold, I am reminded, constantly.
So I write, watch my little guy drift off to nap land, and anticipate my older offspring to be up shortly after. That’s when I will get distracted and get up to prep a meal. Quinoa salad is on the list today. Simple, filling, and can be snacked on all day. Some pool time later and another walk at night is what I’m thinking, but we will let the day just take it’s course.
I pulled an oracle card and reminded myself that I have done so much work to get to this point. Sometimes I get caught up in the habit of needing to be doing..except I don’t! I just have to BE. All my hard work has brought forth my peace and now I just need to exist in it. Rest in it. Be inspired by it!
I am not a vacation and I have certainly not run from anything. I am simply existing in a reality where I have removed so many false paradigms and I am still learning how to slow down my mind and just exist. This practice can be torturous if I let it, or it can be heavenly if I just accept it.